Spring Cleaning

I love spring!  I love spring more than I love New Years.  There's just something about everything finally starting to bloom after a long winter.  To me spring is the light at the end of the long tunnel called winter.  One of my favorite spring time activities is spring cleaning.  Boxing up all of your winter clothes and breaking out your summer clothes.  I spent part of the weekend shopping for new clothes since it's basically summer in Houston. 

This year I decided to add on to my spring cleaning list.  I made the decision to do some internal spring cleaning.  I sat down and thought about all of the fears and stresses that I had been holding on to for far too long.  And I decided to let them go. 

My family has been telling me for a while that my fears and worries are not necessary.  I am a big worrier.  I worry about how I will learn to cook a different dinner every night once I'm married.  I just eat the same thing every night for a week since it's easier because it's just me.  When I meet guys I worry about whether they have actually seen that I am plus size.  I don't want anyone to feel tricked or fooled into dating me.  I worry a lot about the future and things that are out of my control.  There are so many nights when I wish my mind would just stop thinking and worrying and over analyzing so I could get a good nights sleep.

Letting go of the fears and worries and over thinking is not going to happen overnight.  And it's not going to be easy.  But when I think about all of the time that I spend on a daily basis worrying and over thinking, I wonder about all of the great things I could be doing with that time and energy instead.  So all of my fears about my size and possible future relationships and everything else that I stress about, I'm releasing them.  Letting them go.  Because I deserve better than the way I've been treating myself.  And because even your soul deserves a good cleaning every now and then.

Until Next Time,